ONEWORLDLIVE.COM | My Relationships

Is there a perfect time to have a baby? There is, and it has nothing to do with the infamous biological clock. The ideal time to become a parent is when you are emotionally and physically ready, regardless of your age. Whether you adopt a child or have assistance in creating your own, there is a growing trend to start families later in life. In the year 2000, roughly 1 out of every 12 babies will be born to women 35 and older.

Physically speaking, the 20's are considered a prime age to become pregnant. Miscarriage, infertility and medical risks are lowest for a woman before she turns 30, but statistics never hold true for everyone. With medical breakthroughs occurring every time you turn on the evening news, a healthy woman in her 40's can have a normal, safe pregnancy. Health concerns aside, here are some advantages of waiting to consider before you jump on the baby bandwagon.

Mommy. Many psychologists believe the different developmental stages of her years can positively or negatively impact her parenting skills. Women in their 20's are still establishing themselves personally and engaging in their own growth. More mature women have had time to ground themselves emotionally and develop a healthy self-esteem. With the beginning stages of growth behind them, women in their 30's are more apt to be working on a higher level of intimacy. In a nutshell, women in their 30's are less egocentric, likely to have completed college, done their soul-searching and established a career, all of which enhances her ability to guide a child successfully.

Daddy. Men must psychologically separate from their mothers in order to achieve manhood. While in his 20's, a man is still trying to cement himself in society as strong and capable. In an attempt to realize his ability to provide for himself and a family, men often don't allow themselves to be sensitive or show their true emotions. By the time a male enters his 30's he's more comfortable with his role in society and within his own family. This familiarity allows a man to behave in a more nurturing manner, offering tenderness to his child without inner conflict.

Family Scenario. Older families tend to be more stable. Second marriages have a 70 to 80 percent success rate compared to the 50 percent success rate of first marriages. By elementary school almost half of the children born to younger parents will have lived through a divorce with joint custody or become part of a combined family. Older families are more likely to seek counseling and have a higher level of maturity combined with life-experience to work through family issues.

Finance. With age comes career stability and financial resources. It's likely that people in their 30's and 40's have been working longer and earn a professional's salary. They are usually able to afford resources for help, with less strain on the bank account. An older woman may be able to afford to work part time (or from home) while her baby is growing and then step back into the career arena. Young parents just staring out in their careers may not have the options or contacts to leave a new job and return to the work force with ease.

Simply by living longer, older parents can bring a wealth of experience that a younger parent can't possibly have acquired. A younger parent most likely went from their family, out into the world and then into a relationship that closely resembles their previous family structure. The knowledge and more developed sense of self give older parents a confidence that is often reflected in their children.

-- Kristy Paige